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a worried father

Posted: Tue Oct 10, 2017 6:38 am
by WimDC
English is not my native language (I live in Flanders/Belgium), so I hope you understand something of it…


Just outline the situation: our son (22j) has recently graduated without problems (in Flanders: Bachelor's Laboratory and then 1j BaNaBa).

He has more than likely a slight variant in ASS (we think PDD-NOS?), But it was never diagnosed and he himself finds there’s "nothing wrong" with him. For an outsider he’s behavior is not really exceptional - except that he is "quiet and not really social" ..

Now that he graduated, the next (difficult) obstacle should be taken: job application and work.

But that first thing (job application) is the problem now.

He does not make the least effort to search for vacancies, let alone to respond to vacancies we show him.

Either does he not respond, or does the (typical?) reprieve behavior appear ("I'll take a look").

After much insistence, I had - together with him, because otherwise it would not have happened - subscribed to VDAB (a Flemish Job-center). He does receive vacancies, but, according to him, those are not what he wants. On our question what he really wants, a reaction will come "I do not know myself" and the dialogue stops.

He also has no real hobbies or leisure time; spend the days reading a book, reading crosswords and sudoku's seems to be something more for an 80 year old than for a youngster of 22j. When we talk about it, he gets angry.

From the many articles I've read on the Internet, I found many people with ASS who really want to work, but I didn’t find people who do not want to search.

Now my question: Does anyone recognize himself in such a situation, where a graduate youth does not make any efforts to seek work?

And / or does this fall under the characteristics of ASS / PDD-NOS?

Thanks for any help,

A worried father...